Impacting Cities & Communities thru Prayer
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I too can relate to the difference in the style of praying between my husband and I. He is very concise and patterned but I know his heart speaks more words than I can audibly hear. We know that God says He is a rewarder of those that diligently seek Him. I think that persisting in a prayer pattern you have on your heart is that diligence. There really isn't a particular pattern or formula so to speak that works the same for all, but when you have time alone, put some worship music on. Something that will stay in worship and not suddenly change into a great upbeat praise song! That gives you a little time to really get on your knees and tell Him how much you love Him just for who He is. Seek His face, and wait to hear Him draw closer, and He will. Your increased intimacy with Him will create all kinds of prayer opportunities. I hope this is some help to you. I will keep you in my prayers that The Holy Spirit will draw you closer and reveal spiritual truths and tenderness. Love you and your passion for prayer!
I can relate to some of what you say because my husband of 40 years and I do not pray in the same way at all. He usually prays before our meals and sometimes if there is a particular concern I will add a little something at the end. Before we head out the driveway for a long trip or to visit someone who is going through a particularly rough time he will often ask me to pray before we leave. I guess these are mostly what I call "bullet prayers" that are short and to the point.
These may be some ways you could get involved in praying with your husband, I guess under his terms, but it's a start. As he sees your prayers answered, who know what could happen.
My wife and I have very different prayer styles, too. I think it has a lot to do with the differences between men and women in a lot of respects. For instance, a man and woman come back from a certain special event and if you ask the man to describe what happened, he will give you a very concise, to the point (and maybe vague) account of what happened. The woman, on the other hand, will recount all the little details, her feelings while she was there, etc. Same way with when a man comes home from work and his wife asks him how his day was. His answer will be short, sweet, and to the point, while a woman will tend to be a whole lot more detailed about her day.
I, for one, am a "get straight to the point" kind of guy, too. This often (though not always) shows up in my verbal prayer life as well, especially, it seems, when praying with someone else like my wife.
My advice is to pray for your husband (which is a good idea anyway), but learn to understand that it might not be a difficiency he has, but rather it's just the way he's wired.
Now...having said all that, I do know that people in the Church in other countries like China, Korea, etc. pray a WHOLE lot more than we Americans do, mostly because they have a much greater sense of dependency upon God because of their circumstances, and they consequently are seeing much greater fruit with people coming to Christ in some cases by the millions. We Americans just don't have that sort of urgency and dependence because we have so much. This isn't necessarily a good thing. My heart longs for us to snap out of our complacency and rise above our prosperity and have the sense of urgency and dependence that God can use to really move mightily in this nation.
I was thinking about the difference in your prayer styles and how you said your husband likes prayer short and sweet. I would accommodate his style in order to have a moment in prayer rather than nothing. Also, if you gave him a note card with the words, "Pray with me" and then have one daily topic for him to focus on for the day do you think he would reject this request? Maybe some form of tangible reminder like that would help him to be at least for a few moments of the day praying along with you even if he is not in close physical proximity. I think you need to try different approaches until you find something that works and not get too disappointed with many trials that don't work but keep praying that God will show you what will make it work.
I have several suggestions. One, you can only change you, so allow God to work in your husband. As he sees you do, maybe he will follow. Second, start up a women's prayer time with 2 or 3 friends. You can do this at whatever time is convenient for you all. It doesn't have to be very long, but in my experience, I would allow at least an hour. Have them over for morning coffee after the kids and hubby have left for work, if you don't work outside of the home. You could do it during one lunch hour each week. You will find that you will find more and more to pray for even if you agree to just stay inside the realm of your families as you get more and more comfortable with each other. Just don't allow it to turn into a "hen party." Third, begin your day with praise and worship, whether you are singing or just raising your hands and praising Him in whispers or shouting! God loves praise! Finally, learn to "hear God's voice." One exercise that I have encouraged women to do is to find a secluded spot, turn off the phone and television, relax. Then praise God, petition Him, thank Him then.....sit back and wait on Him to talk to you in that "still, small voice." It may take you several tries to figure out how He is speaking to you, but He will speak to you. Our biggest problem in hearing from God is learning to shut up and listen! Hope this helps!!